Letting go can be the hardest thing we as humans have to do, because it is centered on acceptance of what has happened and moving on. It is extremely hard when years of something have been worked upon and to have it suddenly brushed away can be alarming. Friendships, positions, or goals can all be categorized under this thread that binds them together.
Today was a day when I let go of two friendships, one position, and a very big goal of mine.
Coming to acceptance is hard to choke down because we so often still have the spark of hope that someday our hard work will pay off. And I surely believe it will for you and I but there is a time when there is too much pain and suffering hurting you or me, that the effort is not worth the aftermath. What I mean about this I was in a friendship where I kept giving my friend second chances but never given any in return. Toxic relationships can really gnaw at the core and in the end so much stress and agony have been built up for nothing when the friendship wasn’t meant to be in the end. If you’re going through a difficult relationship right now, you need to ask yourself if it’s worth it? If you have been holding on for this long, it surely means something to you, but does it mean something to the other person? A relationship depends on reciprocation and if love and support is not reciprocated, it’s time to stop hurting. It’s difficult to draw the line of where to give someone another chance or even to give life in general another chance. Should I keep working hard in this job sector to show my dedication even thought I have been rejected time and time again, or should I draw the line to move on and discover better things? Whatever the choice, life leads you down, often, two paths. Both paths that independently will both contribute to even more decisions down the road. But once you make the decision take it with bold steps and venture on courageously!
The second thing this week I needed to face was stepping down from my position of Vice President as I did not run as next years Interact VP. Abnegating a position like this one was especially painful for me because I had worked my way up the ladder instead of being handed an executive position at my school’s club. This club has been close to my heart and watching it grow these past 4 years, I am extremely proud of the process and progress it has made. Unfortunately, as time goes on and new executives join teams, often the mission statement or values of a club has changed. The same activities may be still going on, but deep down I knew that even though I still wanted to keep my title, I needed to pave way to make better efforts elsewhere with my other intiatives/projects. Accepting the fact that I was now part of something that had a different purpose, I needed to re-evaluate my own priorities and values. By no means am I saying the club changed for the worse, but what I am saying is that I could not adapt to this new change due to me standing by my principles of how a club should be run and what it’s ultimate purpose is ( to help others and make a difference). If you’re in a situation where you’re working or volunteering for something you used to care deeply about but that passion has slowly died down because you don’t see the purpose of the organization anymore, it is not going to get better unless you do something about it. In my case even though I had a high position, my voice did not matter and was not listened to. Do not let others take you for granted because all in all, we as each individuals are capable of so much more than anyone can ever imagine. So either keep working hard to better your current situation or learn that it’s time to move on. Use the past experience to make what you’re going to do even better!
The third and final let go of this week was a big goal of mine. *No I didn’t let go of my dream to use education to change the world* but what I did let go was getting into an Ivy League university. Even though I never did anything solely for university applications, I realized that the stress and forcing myself to do certain things really interfered with my daily life and in the end my marks. Due to my narrow minded goal of getting into university, I began overlooking many important details of life and I started psyching myself out. Before my friends got into Ivy Leagues which was a few weeks ago, my marks were improving and everything was going great. But after they got in, I felt a lot of pressure, and that catalyzed into self doubt and everything started going downhill. BUT, now everything’s better because I’ve lifted off that boulder! I’m a lot better 🙂 Why? Aren’t goals good? Yes they are good! But I accepted the fact that there are so many variables in life that even if you worked your hardest, there were unexpected variables that were still going to block your way. It doesn’t mean you shouldn’t work hard but you shouldn’t measure your self worth by your results that add up to the big goal. Now I still work hard but I accept that fact that I’m just going to do the best I can, and if I don’t make it, it’s going to be okay. I don’t know what your case is, and it might not be okay if you don’t secure that job because you have a family to feed. And the only thing I can tell you is this, let tomorrow’s worry’s take care of their own. Your time is now, and you can either make the best of what you have or freak yourself out by your own goals.
If it’s anyone that can achieve their dreams, it’s you. But in the process of doing so, remember to love yourself, give yourself time leeway to be able to fail, and most importantly believe in yourself<3