Two Lung Collapses in Two Weeks; The Art of Surprise

It changed my values, my thoughts, my dreams.

The thought of not knowing the future did not bother me

It was more of the oblivion of the past that haunted me

I had thought those were my final moments

But long from it

 

The act of breathing is simplicity

But when pain shoots through you every time

You breathe

what are you supposed to do?

You’ll have to live it down

 

I remember that week of not moving

With every twitch, a stabbing danger through my shoulder

Like being crushed slowly by a boulder that wouldn’t lift

Being caught in the murky waters of your own drowning lungs

Not moving, for one week

The oil and sweat from your skin cakes your body

Envelops you with a thick grossness

That you can’t get rid of

 

Even when it’s over now

You’ll never forget those waiting moments

Patience is a virtue

Watching time go by when you’re in pain

It’s excruciating

No matter what you do

Time will not fly away fast enough

 

So those seconds, those hours, those days,

before finally a doctor came to me

And said I could go home

 

And I thought the hospital was the uphill climb!

Boy was I wrong

Watching the people around me going about their daily lives

When everything changed for me

was a bit like hell

It changed my values

My thoughts

My dreams

 

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